I went to NERO and I'm not sure if I went over calories or not, I couldn't count them, but I did get a lot of exercise running around.  So I think I was okay and not cheating.

I did gain a half a pound, so who knows what happened there.

I feel so hungry right now, but maybe that's because I didn't have my afternoon shake yet.

It Feels Like Friday

I keep getting confused.

I completely reworked my shaping plan - taking out music and exercise, and it got approved.  That makes it easy for NERO/Folks this weekend.  I really wish there wasn't class tonight, I have so much to do to get ready for this event that I feel like I'm scrambling worse than an egg.  But as this is a weight loss blog, I'm not going to bore anyone with those details.

NERO will be good exercise.  I walk lots and run lots and generally cast from the front lines.  So hopfully that will balance out whatever I take in, make Sunday a cheat day, and go from there.

Summer's Gone

I lost 2 pounds in 1 day.  I don't know what I'm doing correctly, if it's the calorie deficit, the water, or the green tea caplets I'm taking, but it's slowly coming on, even with the over-deficit.  It almost makes me want to eat less.

I finally exercised.  I walked at lunch on Monday, got here to work early in the morning to walk 30 minutes in the halls, and walked 35 minutes this morning.  So there's that.

Still only drinking breakfast and lunch and eating a dinner.  It's still keeping me under 1200 calories for the most part.

Water, Water Everywhere

I'm sort of convinced that my water consumption correlates to my weight loss.  I gained 3 pounds over the weekend and drank hardly any water; I drink my half gallon jug yesterday and I lose2.9 pounds.

I guess I need to get a jug for home so I can monitor that as well.  Only 125.9 pounds to go!  That's daunting.  The app I use says that if I keep going like I am I'll be down to 225 in 5 weeks.  I guess that's my short term goal.

Now to go do my lunch walk.  NERO's coming, gotta have a cheat day/weekend.

Monday, Monday

I'm a little depressed.  I stayed under my calorie content - I was sure to do that - but I still gained 3 pounds over the weekend.  I guess it goes to show that no matter if I stay under goal, the I'll still gain weight if I eat at a fast food place.

I feel dumb and the eating out wasn't worth it at all.

I downloaded 3 fitness magazines onto my Nook, maybe they have some insight.  Maybe I'm just not taking in enough and it's catching up to me weight wise.  I don't know what else to do.

It's Friday, I'm in Love

Down to 236 for first time in recent months.  It's been a long time.  My measurements are for the most part getting smaller, so at least I know it's coming from somewhere, right?

I may adjust the experiment.  I think I still have some time to work on my shaping paper.

Two Posts in One Day

I'm wondering if I should take the exercise component out of this experiment.  I feel like I'm setting myself up to fail, here.

I don't know if I'll be under calories because I'm making my chicken soup casserole for both my family and a second one for a friend.  I had a turkey burger today for lunch because I forgot my protein shake, which should count as my "solid" food for today and just drink my protein shake, but I'm so hungry that I'll probably give in to the cheesy goodness that is my casserole.  I don't know, though.  Maybe I need to get on the treadmill to offset the calories but I don't know if it'll be enough to actually offset it or not.  It's 579 calories alone, 36g of fat, 1400g of sodium, 20g of carbs; I really don't know that exercise alone would make it so that I'm not torpedoed by a weight gain.

I don't have a catchy title

I'm back down to 237.6.  Hopefully I'll be down below that tomorrow.  But that's the goal, right?

NERO is in 2 weeks.  I guess I have to be on the ball the whole week before because that is going to have to be a cheat weekend; none of the food is really good for you, plus we go socially to Folks on Sunday after the event.

I'm on the road to no cheating this weekend.  Even though my shaping plan hasn't been approved yet, I'm trying to keep to it.  I've just been so tired and my asthma is flaring up.  I haven't exercised at all, unless I count running for my train.  Which I don't, really.

Manic Monday

One of my professors says "correlation doesn't equal causation".  I think I disagree.

I went another weekend eating badly and I shot up to 242.6  You can't tell me there's no correlation between my gaining weight and the cause - my not staying under 1,250 a day for those 2 days.

I haven't started my shaping phase because I haven't gotten feedback on my proposal, so I took a cheat day.  Or two, really.  I really need to get on this, because I feel really crappy for gaining all that back.

Spooky (Friday the 13th)

I'm down a little more.  I know I probably shouldn't weigh every day, but it's part of my data for the class, so I'm doing it.  I'm down to 238.6.

I'm taking pictures in the mirror every Friday and I don't see a marked improvement, even though I've lost about 18 pounds total since I started this (even when I was dieting a bit before I started this experiment).  I also don't understand that even though I'm losing weight, why I'm not measuring any smaller in the waist and hips and bust.

The Numbers Game

I broke the 230s.  This hopefully looks to be working.

Hungry

I read an article on Cracked once about how if you were going to try to lose weight you had to be prepared to be hungry.  Then there are other articles about how you're never supposed to be hungry.  I don't know which one it is.

Somedays, staying under the calorie goal is simple.  I'm not hungry.  Other days it's like the hardest thing in the world to accomplish.  I guess that happens more on the weekend.  I don't know if that makes sense or not.

I worry that at 1200-1250 that I'm not getting enough, but my tracker does say that I'll be down the 10 pounds in 5 weeks if I continue to eat like I do.  So am I in starvation mode?  All the stupid things like WebMD say I need to cut down to 1200-1250.

Maybe this all stems from the fact that I'm not really losing as fast as I'd like.  I'm still losing, it's just slow.  I wonder if the exercise thing has anything to do with it - I'm not exercising at all and I said I would at least 30 minutes a day.  I think that just adds to my calorie deficit and if I stick to the plan I have now, I'll have trouble making 1200 a day much less 1300-1400.  So I'm at a loss.

Should it be low protein?  Low fat?  Low carb?  Moderate this, moderate that?  There's so much out there.  A woman lost 89 pounds in a year on a high fat moderate protein diet.  Maybe I need to reach for that.

Tuesday's Gray and Wednesday, Too

I didn't update yesterday because I was home sick from work and I didn't even consider it.

After last weekend, where I didn't really record any calories, I finally got below 240 somehow.  I don't know how.  I'm back to 241 after it's caught up with me, but I'm still close to the 230s as opposed to the 250s so I don't care.

I met my calorie goal yesterday pretty much because I ate nothing until dinner.  I was just too sick to think about it.  I did get my protein shake things at Sam's Club so I have those and a peanut butter sandwich before I leave for school.  There's chicken for dinner but I kind of hope I don't need it.  Yes, I know I need to stay above 1200 calories at the least, but I'm afraid to eat anything when I'm trying to stay on track.  Afraid to eat too much of stuff, too many carbs, etc.

I wonder if I ate my protein shake meal replacement things (30 grams of protein per) twice a day and had a peanut butter sandwich on this wheat bread I'm using at night, then that would be enough?  I take a multivitamin.  I wonder that if it met my calorie requirements then I might see some improvement if I sustain myself on just these foods?

I have to come up with a rewards system for this paper next and I have no idea what to do.  I might do something with money, but I'm saving up money for this in game wedding plus grad school plus NERO once a month.  I guess I'll have to think of something.  Maybe seeing the weight drop off is a reward, but I don't think that's the rewards system the professor is quite talking about.

More later!

ETA 7:56 - I finished my tracker for the project.  Now to write up some data to hand in with my datasheet. And now I can stop being humiliated every time I fail at my goal.  Maybe that's what I need to do anyway.  I'd do it here but no one reads these.

Hard Habit to Break

I weighed in and lost just about 2 pounds from yesterday.  Which makes me feel good; I was under my calorie intake but I didn't exercise.  I just got home too late.

The hardest problem with a 1200 calorie diet is this:  after I've recorded part of my breakfast and all of my lunch (I know what I'm going to eat) I only have 721 left.  I have to try to get through the day to get to dinner, which who knows how many calories that will be?

I haven't even added the protein shake I'm about to drink for breakfast.  Add that, and...561 calories left.

I do think that maybe I'm becoming obsessive over my weight.  Losing the 2 pounds is a boost, but I hope I can stay on that downward trajectory.  The weekend will be the hardest part.

'Til Tuesday

Well, I didn't update on Monday, but it was a holiday.  I didn't even remember to update.

I pretty much let things go this weekend.  It was nice though I felt kind of guilty every time I "cheated".  Well, it's a new week, I start recording data, so let's see how this goes, shall we?

I supposed that - at least for this class -  that I should be writing longer posts.  It's just that it's early and I have no idea what to say.

I did get complained at by my best friend and my husband's best friend for restricting myself to 1200 calories, but if it's what I have to do, then it's what I have to do.

I think I mentioned it before, but I put up this little shrine in my cubicle to remind myself not to eat badly and to drink the water I'm supposed to.  I added the dress we're making for my LARP wedding - it's a 20 (that's the highest the pattern goes) and I'm a 22 at best, a 24 at worst.  So there's that.  Pictire of the dress is below:

I need to be able to fit into this thing.  Yeah, the wedding is far off (a year - married in August), but like any bride, I want to lose the weight to be "pretty", even if the wedding is just in role play.

Enough rambling for now, but hopefully I'll be able to stick to my plan and not fail miserably and embarrass myself in front of my professor when he sees my data.